Halfway Point

I have been in Costa Rica for 5 WEEKS! That is crazy. I am at the halfway point with 5 weeks left to go. I have so many thoughts and feelings on the trip thus far and on what is to come.

I am still processing the last five weeks and my time as a volunteer at CAP. The many challenges I faced with the culture and with my placement itself aren't completely understood yet. I am still unsure as to why my placement was so...unsuccessful (as much as I hate to say that). I have yet to understand my purpose in being in Costa Rica for that time in regard to my internship.

In all, I have loved it. I have loved adapted to a new culture. I love the friends I have made and my host family. It is all very exciting and invigorating. I love being in such a beautiful country with so many opportunities. I have enjoyed the slow paced life that is so very foreign to me. I have learned a lot and gained new perspectives, which are some of the most important parts of being abroad outside of the immediate goals with internships and classes.

There have been other challenges, of course, outside of my placement and cultural adjustment. Things like missing home and missing people. There is always a struggle between doing everything you can here and not blowing all your money and others.

While I have a fear of the next five weeks outshining the last for some reason, I am very excited for them and think that they should be better. I am excited to feel more productive and like I have a purpose. Part of me feels a sense of relief now that I am done with my internship and no longer have to battle all the thoughts in my head everyday about what I was doing and if I wasted time and this and that. I will have to face it again when I try to get credit at BG but that is a whole separate thing.

I am excited to learn.

I think time is going to go much quicker now that I will be busier and my mind will be much more occupied. I like this because I will be excited to return home but I also feel anxious when I think about all of the places I have yet to visit here.

One of the most prominent challenges and sources of excitement right now is all of the new people. ISA brought in around 80 new students. That is A LOT. There was much less that started on June 1 like me and a few that had been there a week earlier. Many left last weekend but the majority of my friends stayed for another class session or ELAP. However, most of them are leaving this weekend or in the next couple weekends. Just a few are staying until August like me. Jenny and I talked a lot about this today and all of the strange dynamics we are facing now. I was blessed with such wonderful people here and am sad to see them all go at different times. This makes me not want the new students. I don't want to make new friends when I am still building the friendships that are only a few weeks old. I don't want to lose touch or be preoccupied by classes and new hangouts. At the same time, I don't want to isolate myself from the new students to hang out solely with my original group and be left without good relationships when they all leave. There are many more thoughts and feelings on this topic that we are struggling with. I am excited for classmates and meeting new people still. I have new housemates that are great girls and I am excited to continue to get to know them.

So many of my goals have been met or are still in progress and I now have others. With the start of classes and my second half of the trip, I want to (obviously) learn as much as I can about Costa Rica, its people, and its environment. I want to continue to build my friendships and make new ones. In particular, I want to build better relationships with ticos but not just my mamatica. We have been told that experiences are greatly enhanced if relationships are built with local people. I hope to make a good tico friend or at least have good conversations and fun with some. Although I will be busier with work, I want to go to more of the dance spots to practice latin dancing and see locals dance. In all, I just want to continue to have fun and experience as much Costa Rican as I can.

Peace&Love,

Taylor